Using Proper Anatomy With My Children

As I became a mother, the first child you go through all the "firsts" and begin to figure out how you want to parent. I remember when my daughter was 18 months, pointed at my breasts and proceeded to ask me, "What are those mommy?". I didn't even hesitate and told her that they are BREASTS. Simple and easy enough or so I thought.

I remember mentioning this conversation to a close relative as it was an off guard moment and I wanted to relate to someone about it. They were shocked with me and that I was using proper anatomy and being blunt. That person began to make me feel like I'm weird for telling my daughter what the proper anatomy of a male and female body is. They said I deserved to be embarrassed if my child used those words in public. I began to second guess myself.. was I being weird? Should I use "pee-pee" instead of the proper term?

I decided to research whether you should be using proper terminology or pet names for the human body. These are the two conclusions I had came to:

1. Predators use pet names. If I teach my children the proper terminology for their body, if they come home and use a "pet name" than this gives me a red flag. I can instantly have an open conversation to find out who they learnt that from.

2. Your body isn't anything to be ashamed of. I want my children to have a positive body image and know it's okay to talk about their body. I don't want them to grow into those teenage years and feel that they can't ask me questions. I grew up feeling ashamed and it led me to ask my peers and learn the wrong misinformation about my body. I'd rather change that history than repeat it.

Now, I'm not saying it was easy because I did get comments from people if they heard my child asking outright questions. A perfect example was I had taken my daughter to a church service (she was 2 years old at the time) and right during a prayer with the entire church silent she had a statement to make.

"Mom, you have a vagina."

I looked up shocked at first but then I smiled at her and confirmed quietly that yes because mommy is a girl I have a vagina.

I ended up giggling with the other people around me but 2 year old's are honest. In the moment I was embarrassed but now, 4 years later nobody has every brought it up. At the end of the day she learnt properly and didn't search for the potential wrong answers.

Frankly, nobody now has anything to say about it. For some reason it was a stigma as my children were young but now they don't bat a lash. My theory was that the people it bothered were not exposed to that conversation and all I could do was let my child know that they could me ask me anything but try to do so in private and not publicly. Children just need to be taught and it takes time. You can't grow a seed into a tree overnight, it takes time and care.

All you parents out there, you do you. You know what's right for your family and your children. Do the research and come to your own conclusions.