One important rule I have learnt over these years is this.. I need to take a break too.
Seems simple doesn't it? I would think so too but when you are in your head space and are feeling overwhelmed, underappreciated, angry, sad.. it's easy to forget about you. I know I have many days, months and even at one point a year of not taking a break. The saying Happy Wife Happy Life.. I don't necessarily agree with it however there is some truth to it. In a household where the mom is the central figure or perhaps the dad .. if they are the ones who do majority of the chores, the homework, punishments, ectara than realistically if the "central" parent is off than it becomes a trickle effect. I by no means mean that you can't have both parents as the central or perhaps it changes through the months or whatever your situation is but you do need to take care of yourself to be the best version of you.
That being said how do I squeeze in the breaks? I've got a few ways.
1. Nap time - it took me awhile to realize that when my babies/toddlers would go for a nap this is when it was a good time for me to refresh. Watch a movie, read a book.. whatever you need to unwind a bit. Now, if your kids have outgrown this stage than let me introduce you to QUIET TIME .
2. Quiet Time - I use quiet time when my children are constantly whining, bickering, fighting or just plain on my nerves. Typically it is about 1/2 an hour to an hour. Sometimes they lay down, read a book or play with their toys but it allows both of us to regroup and hopefully move forward in a better mood
3. Electronic Time - The days that my anxiety is really bad are days that I just let my kids decide what they want to do and if that means tablet time or 2 movies than so be it. Don't let yourself feel bad if this happens a few times because you need time too.
4. Evenings - As soon as my kids are in bed I am off the clock typically. This is especially if I didn't have any ME TIME throughout the day. I've openly told my husband that I just need to watch mindless tv so don't ask me to do anything else.
5. "Babysitter" - Sometimes I just want to be able to shop and not fight with my kids.. cue in a grandparent, aunt, uncle or friend to help watch the kids. It can even be that I'm overwhelmed and have been solo parenting for a week or a month and I just need a break. Don't feel ashamed to ask for the break.
I've really had to embrace that if the dishes don't get done today it's not the end of the world. Tomorrow is another day. What really matters to me is if my kids had a great, good or decent day than that is what counts.. Take the time you need to comfort your mind, body and soul.
Do you have another break suggestion? I'm always open to new ideas to try.
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